Healing from heartbreak can be a long and painful process. Some days it feels like you haven’t made any progress at all. The experience can be painful and tiring. Remember that it is a beautiful thing to watch yourself slowly get better everyday.
When someone you consider as your significant other breaks your heart it hurts. This happens because our brain has gotten used to that steady supply of feel good chemicals when your with that person. It’s like having to get over an addiction. The withdrawal symptoms of heartbreak are all those tears, headaches, and the occasional chest ache.
You have built a future with this person in your head. So many images of how it could be will swim through your mind. It can be hard to let that go. Taking baby steps towards progress will help to you in accepting a break up and moving on.
Getting past a break up can be a difficult time in life.
You know how things look better from a distance? Remembering all the good things you guys had at one time. Don’t forget about all the messed up fights, slamming doors, and long silences. Don’t forget about how toxic it felt in the relationship.
If you are like me, then you start feeling like you were the one at fault. It was not just you that made the relationship fall apart. Don’t forget that it takes two to tango. I cried for five hours straight the first and only time I got my heart broken. I couldn’t sleep that night. I couldn’t eat the next day or the day after that.
For a week, I didn’t want to talk to him because he had betrayed me. I hurt so bad. Then the next week I was calling him, texting him, apologizing for being so hard to deal with, and wanting to talk about us to settle things.
For two years after that first heartbreak we continued in a cycle of trying to get back together, and then he’d do something to hurt me. I’d avoid him for a while only to go back again because I was in love, and I never wanted to let the love of my life go. I was literally addicted to the trauma.
Having your heart broken can be a confusing time.
At a point we even ended up being friends with benefits because he told me that was the best he could give me. I had the belief that it was better to be with him this way than to not have him at all, right?
It was a few months from the break up anniversary to become three years that I got tired. After all the ignored warnings and admonitions from my friends for the past two years, I finally realized that I did deserve better. I was holding on so hard, and all I got from that relationship was a lot of pain.
I shared this story because I wanted to use it to explain my next point. Not all relationships deserve a part two. The brain might urge you to fight for it because you think you will never find someone better. It’s not true. I can say this because I have been in that spot
Make deliberate choices and take it one step at a time when accepting a break up. You will get to a point where you will be able to see a picture of your ex without the flutter in your heart. That phase comes after you passed the I – hate – my ex phase, just so you know.
What is the secret to getting past a break up?
Honestly, I think you should just give yourself time. Forgive yourself. It was not your fault that you couldn’t work things out with Delete all of his/her pictures from your phone, unfollow all of their social media pages, and block their number.
You are probably wondering how to deal with heartbreak depression. Learn a new skill, hang out with your friends, travel, just go out and get your head away from them. Do things that’d distract you enough. By the time you’d even remember you won’t have enough time to dwell on how hurt you are.
Don’t spend too much time watching sad romances or reading books that would make you cry. Don’t listen to sad songs which successfully get you into the depressed mode. It is good to process those emotions, but don’t focus on activities that are a setback to the healing process.
Don’t forget practices of self love after break up. Do things that you enjoy, spend time on your hobbies, with your family, develop your skills at work and just take a little time away from the dating scene. Self love after break up is is so important.
It is not advisable to go straight into another relationship if it’s only to help you get over the one you lost. even more The result may be the reason for more tears. Talk to someone about it or write about the hurt you’re feeling. It’s a way of letting the pain out and understanding your feelings.
Understand that you won’t get better immediately.
Getting past a break up may include some relapses. It is okay to trip, but once you do you pick yourself right back up, and don’t go running back to them just because it felt right at the moment, or just because they were nice to you. Keep yourself busy.
I’d say give yourself total distance from them for a while, but what if you work in the same place and you have to see them everyday? You could explain the situation to them and request that they don’t make this harder for you than it already is.
Forgiveness is key. Forgive yourself. Forgive him/her. Having your heart broken can be a traumatic experience. Let go of the pain, come to a place where you understand that not all things were meant to be. Getting past your break up is one more step towards healing.
Navigating the break up process can be difficult, but it does yield beautiful results.